Diving's Dumb things.

Last night was our dive clubs monthly meeting and as usual after all the official things were out of the way and the meeting closed the best stories started to flow. If you have ever been to a club meeting or function of any kind you will be familiar with this phenomenon. These discussions usually start with one story and develop from there, and they always have a theme. Well last nights discussion theme as you can guess from the title was diving's dumb things.
We in our club have an annual award for the dumbest thing of the year it is called the longbottom award (obviously we cant have a Darwin award as we don't want anyone to die!), and award worthy events are mentioned and minuted at each meeting. Nothing new was presented last night and so some of the old stories from before the inception of the award started to flow.

They included the following.
Numerous persons driving off with floatlines and guns still attached to the boat resulting in the loss of both line and gun.
Diver's being attacked by puffer fish, both small and giant.
A vehicle being submerged whilst at the boat ramp.
Numerous instances of lost propellers.
A carpet shark attaching it self to a divers arm, then said diver being abused by the boat driver for not getting in the boat, to which he replied I cant this things too f#@king heavy.
A younger diver holding a knife by the blade to then have his brother grab it by the handle and yank it away resulting in a trip to the ER. Oh but wait this gets better, The young brothers were accompanied by their Mother to the ER, where they happened upon the previously mentioned carpet shark victim having his arm attended to, and the identity of the abusive boat driver was none other than their Father.
A diver spearing a Jobfish and then handing it to the boat driver only to have it latch on to the boat drivers hand putting teeth through finger nails!!!!
A diver spearing a shark only to have it turn and bite another diver(this happened more than once in days gone by).
A diver on seeing a penguin asked another diver if he should spear it, the diver answered why? its a penguin to which the first diver replied but no one will believe I saw it if I don't have it. The penguin escaped.
A diver being warned by a ranger for having his dog in the boat close to a marine national park, to which he replied "If you are worried about her eating all your fish forget it she's no that good a swimmer and we cant get a mask that fits her".

The list goes on.
It got me to thinking what dumb things have you done or seen?